ledbythewind | APPOINTMENTS POST

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APPOINTMENTS POST

This post can be used to thread with or get in contact with Richard at any point when he doesn't have a post up! Just comment here (please use the format [Action, June 24th], [Voice, March 5th], etc. to make it clear when the thread is taking place and what type of thread it is) for a thread with him; if it's a continuation of another thread or post, please link that so I remember the context of the thread.

GO NUTS.

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[Richard is so late to the party, Sanji doesn't even grace that with a reply - but at least he's moving. Sanji tries to move, too, though the action requires far more precision and energy than he expected. Every muscle twitch tilts the room at odd and uncomfortable angles, like reality is as drunk as they are.

Walking home will be an adventure - if they get home, that is.]

'M gunna carry you. [Blink. Head shake. Sanji cuts off his line of vision by abruptly shutting his eyes. Room, please stop moving] Y'got that?

All right.

[He actually did get that! But he's... not sure what he's supposed to do now. Should he try to stand up again? Probably not, considering he can't seem to do more than get himself up on that elbow.

Instead he'll just settle for half-sitting, half-sprawling on the floor the way he is now, just waiting for Sanji to make the next move.

BALL'S IN YOUR COURT, CHEF.]

[CAN'T THE BALL BE IN YOUR COURT FOR ONCE, RICHARD? Always making Sanji do the dirty work.

By now he's aware that if he tries to stand up and pull Richard with him, they'll both end up on the floor - and the floor and Richard's bony body will be as comfortable the second time around. So instead he shifts onto his hands and knees, scooting closer to the other before facing the opposite direction]

Just... hold onto m' neck. [Yes, bend right over him and clutch at his neck. This is a thing Sanji is asking Richard to do.

He really hopes he doesn't remember any of this tomorrow]

[... WELL, CONSIDERING HE IS THE ONE HERE THAT'S ACTUALLY INTERESTED IN BALLS...

... nah.

But he thinks he gets what Sanji wants him to do! Standing is out, but crawling over enough to flop himself on Sanji's back and put his arms around the man's neck is a definite possibility. He can manage this.

Except for the part where he kind of flops his entire weight onto Sanji. Whoops. Good thing he weighs approximately as much as a twig.]

[... Was that a stiff breeze brushing against his back? Oh, no, it was Richard flopping on top of him. Who weighs less than air, apparently. The tips of Sanji's mouth take a sharp turn south.]

'M makin' you breakfast 'n the mornin'. [Here's to hoping Richard is too drunk to argue before Sanji focuses on the task of standing. Leaning back, he braces both of his arms underneath Richard's legs and hauls them around his waist. Only once they're secure does he suck in a breath and start the long, laborious journey of climbing to his feet.

It takes him approximately 75 seconds, but hell, does every second stretch out for eternity. But Sanji is the one standing triumphant at the end, drunken king in tow]

Natto toast?

[Nope, no arguments here. As Sanji will no doubt learn, that is one of the few things that Richard will almost always eat despite any sort of lack of appetite. Too bad it's possibly the most disgusting food ever.

He's being good, at least, keeping his arms wrapped around Sanji's neck so that he can hold on as the process of liftoff gets started. Maybe wrapping his legs around Sanji's waist will help too! He's going to give it a try.

... no, he really doesn't think there's anything odd about that when he's this drunk.]

[Just keep your toes away from his groin, good sir. He'd hate to have to drop you on your ass. Though as for the request--]

Sure. [He answers before his imagination is kind enough to supply an image, and boy does his nose wrinkle. There are few foods as foul-smelling as natto, though Sanji can stomach it when necessary. But on toast? Ugh, and does he want it topped with some type of shitty cheese or--]

You really like that stuff? [Honest question. Sanji is hoping the answer is no, and he can get away with a "proper" breakfast of eggs and toast, maybe some pancakes.

Food not designed to destroying taste buds, essentially.]

[No worries there; he barely has the coordination to figure out how to get them around Sanji's waist in the first place, much less do anything else with them. He'll just be hanging there like the gawkiest koala ever-- one that is 90% legs, in other words.]

Yes, there's nothing quite like the taste of natto on toast. If only everyone else could understand how wonderful it is...

[Why does everyone hate it so? Okay, so it smells like three-day-old socks, but it tastes delicious, really! (Or maybe his taste buds are just broken, who knows. He's never thought too much about this.)

That's a "yes, that's what he wants for breakfast," by the way.]

Don't think the problem's everyone else, Richard. [Sorry bro. Your natto tastes like shit - this coming from the guy who will eat and make just about anything.]

But alright, I'll make it for you. [Pause] So long as the girls don't mind the smell. [After a brief grunt in which he hoists Richard a little higher along his back, the chef starts a very - very - slow stumble for the door. Drunk or not, he has no illusions about how long this walk home will take. It takes nearly all his concentration keeping his legs from crisscrossing.]

That's very kind of you.

[Sanji gets a... well, it was supposed to be a sort of hair nuzzle, but it turned into something more like Richard just rubbing his face against Sanji's hair. It's okay, though, because Sanji's hair is surprisingly soft and Richard is quickly distracted by this fact. He'll be behaving himself, at least for now.]

[Sanji's only reply:] I'm a chef.

[The hair... nuzzling (?) is distracting on both ends, though thankfully not enough that Sanji runs into any buildings - and enjoy that watermelon scented shampoo, Richard, because Sanji's enough of a man to use girly-scented products whenever the fuck he wants.]

Oi. No eatin' m'hair. [Y'know, just in case he was thinking it]

[Considering that Richard smells like honeysuckle, this is just a bouquet of manliness right here, yep. It does smell rather edible, but thankfully Richard isn't so far gone yet that he'd try something like that.

Yet.]

Now why would I do that?

You keep touchin' it! [Flawless logic, that]

It smells fruity.

[Duh. That was probably also not the best choice of adjectives, not that he even realizes it.]

'Cause of the shitty watermelon. [Richard, if it's a contest of adjectives, look at your competition. You win by default]

[... BRB burying his face in Sanji's hair again to ascertain that it really does smell like watermelon.]

[RICHARD STOP INITIATING "STRANGER DANGER" ALREADY]

O-OI.

[GOOD THING HE'LL STOP A MOMENT LATER.]

You're right, it does!

Of course it does! [You'd think he'd lie like that? Tell you it was watermelon when it was really herbal essence? Jeez.]

Now stop sniffin' my hair!

All right.

[Baww, why you gotta ruin his fun, Sanji? He'll just move to rest his chin on Sanji's shoulder instead, feeling suddenly sleepy.]

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APPOINTMENTS POST

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th] oh god I am just laughing so hard at this entire thread

[action, August 12th] ROFL Luna I almost thought I was writing porn. What is this thread.

[action, August 12th] YOU MEAN IT'S NOT? /shot

action, August 12th] ROFL and suddenly everything makes SENSE.

[action, August 12th] Sanji is taking him home and making him breakfast, perfect setup!

[action, August 12th] My goodness, how bold of him.

[action, August 12th] Richard likes men who are forward

[action, August 12th] Too bad Sanji's usually a tsun.

[action, August 12th] Hahaha

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]

[action, August 12th]